i look for a lot of things if i am going to be seeing someone, dating, a relationship..err w/e. basically giving up my independence ;)
haha. i mainly look for someone who i can relate with, we have the same goals/outlook on life..
now i try to really reallly really get to know someone, their habits, how they are, get a taste as a whole who they really are,then i get a sense of how the relationship will be. Now if they especially remind me of one of my horrible ex's..its a done deal. no dice. there are a ceratin things i will never put myself through ever again just to be in a relationship. id rather be single doing my own thing then dealing with unneccesary bullshit. im not gonna deal with something i dont like or cant stand.....no longer. dont take it personal, its just my preference :|
Friday, November 5, 2010
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Wow..
I've never felt so bad for someone. Honestly. I've been working with this girl for the past 4 1/2 years, my best friend at work. Someone i can always tell everything to.She is so nice, non-judgemental, seriously just a hard worker and a sweetheart. like you could never do anything wrong to her, and she always makes your day!! :D
so yes she has a kid who is such a cutie pie anywho..she has been going out with this douche bag for hmm i'd say roughly 3 years, they were engaged at one point and they live together..and this guy acts like a dad to her kid. Happy lil family.
Lately this guy has been hitting on me, at first he would call me gorgeous err w/e else. i wouldnt say anything back..i seriously just preteded that i didnt see any of that and deleted those texts. While im at work he doesnt hit on me or anything so its weird like yah he'll do what we used to do back when we were kids by picking on someone that kind of thing. On Friday we had an event for Halloween and the library had a food booth, annnnd i was the only one at my work with a food handlers card, and my coworker's bf has one too so i would be stuck working with him for like 6 hours. i was not looking forward to it.
While running errands for the event and working it, things were normal nothing bad happened. But he left early and my coworker didnt have her phone on her to see when her bf was coming back to pick her up. So i told her to grab my phone and to text him. I was trying to show her how to use by phone cuz i couldnt do it cuz i was making food. Then right before she was about to text him...i realize i never erased any of those texts from where he was calling me 'gorgeous' err w/e. So i had to snatch the phone. delete.delete.delete. and text for her becuz it was just wrong place at the wrong time kind of a deal. i didnt want that kind of drama in the middle of this crazy event we were working.
So i was texting him for her til the event was over but once i left he was hitting on me HARDCORE. saying shit someone who ISNT SINGLE, should say. seriously really inappropriate shit, obviously i told him how it was fair to his gf because theyre together..i work with her and im her friend. Basically how fucked up it is what he's doing..because my ex did the same shit he was doing. I was extrememly irritated and enraged because it brought back old feelings i kind of suppressed. I would tell him on and on again i wasnt interested because his gf was my friend/co-worker. he just wouldnt stop, and he still HASNT he wont stop texting me nottttttttttttttttttttttttt appropriate things. i feel so bad for my friend, i know i have to tell her. i have to. it's gonna kill me to be around and she just has no idea how much of a douchebag her bf is.
i know when my ex was doing all of this bullshit, ALL i wanted was for someone to tell me. so i wasnt wasting my time with someone who was such a dickwad.
So lets see how it goes when i break the news to her :/
mannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn :/
so yes she has a kid who is such a cutie pie anywho..she has been going out with this douche bag for hmm i'd say roughly 3 years, they were engaged at one point and they live together..and this guy acts like a dad to her kid. Happy lil family.
Lately this guy has been hitting on me, at first he would call me gorgeous err w/e else. i wouldnt say anything back..i seriously just preteded that i didnt see any of that and deleted those texts. While im at work he doesnt hit on me or anything so its weird like yah he'll do what we used to do back when we were kids by picking on someone that kind of thing. On Friday we had an event for Halloween and the library had a food booth, annnnd i was the only one at my work with a food handlers card, and my coworker's bf has one too so i would be stuck working with him for like 6 hours. i was not looking forward to it.
While running errands for the event and working it, things were normal nothing bad happened. But he left early and my coworker didnt have her phone on her to see when her bf was coming back to pick her up. So i told her to grab my phone and to text him. I was trying to show her how to use by phone cuz i couldnt do it cuz i was making food. Then right before she was about to text him...i realize i never erased any of those texts from where he was calling me 'gorgeous' err w/e. So i had to snatch the phone. delete.delete.delete. and text for her becuz it was just wrong place at the wrong time kind of a deal. i didnt want that kind of drama in the middle of this crazy event we were working.
So i was texting him for her til the event was over but once i left he was hitting on me HARDCORE. saying shit someone who ISNT SINGLE, should say. seriously really inappropriate shit, obviously i told him how it was fair to his gf because theyre together..i work with her and im her friend. Basically how fucked up it is what he's doing..because my ex did the same shit he was doing. I was extrememly irritated and enraged because it brought back old feelings i kind of suppressed. I would tell him on and on again i wasnt interested because his gf was my friend/co-worker. he just wouldnt stop, and he still HASNT he wont stop texting me nottttttttttttttttttttttttt appropriate things. i feel so bad for my friend, i know i have to tell her. i have to. it's gonna kill me to be around and she just has no idea how much of a douchebag her bf is.
i know when my ex was doing all of this bullshit, ALL i wanted was for someone to tell me. so i wasnt wasting my time with someone who was such a dickwad.
So lets see how it goes when i break the news to her :/
mannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn :/
EDC 2010
This past summer was absoultely insane. If i came home, i would come home at 7am or later still fuckered up out of my mind. But what i mostly remember by far is EDC. I wasnt sure if i was going to go because of ride situations..but my dear friend came to the rescue :]]
i dont think weve ever been so excited to go and see our favorite artists and especially when there were gonna be so many PPL and just craziness. We left thursday and got in long beach pretty late, we couldnt sleep at all because we were so excited (seriously i dont think we slept) :P
The next day we left pretty early to meet up with some ppl ..so we didnt have to wait in line long and get in there quick
FINALLY got in and im trying to call ppl from AZ and meet up with them but they were all too fuckered up at the hotel and werent coming til later on. So me and my friend decided to walk around and explore. Ofcourse going down on the main floor, then we went to go see Afrojack, while shuffling my friend runs off and goes dance with a ton of sluts ( haha sorry dude but its true :P ) so i met these awesome ppl who i ran off with...and the rest of the night is a blur, um i just remember being on the kinetic field shuffling my ass off, and giving tons of ppl massages lawl.
Then went to go see Steve Aoki, that stage was SO packed. He should of played on a bigger stage anywho. while waiting for him to play with ppl i just met but felt so close too, lol seriously felt like ive known ALL like 15 or so ppl my whole life. i was right in the center kinda to the front of the crowd because it was just way too packed, andd then it finally started to kick it, things get real blurry and i dont wanna be smushed in this crowd, especially because im surrounded by all guys so im not getting any fresh air. When Steve Aoki played Warp, during the screaming part everyone went crazy and i was getting stuck in the middle of the hugh mosh pit, everything was starting to kick in and a mosh pit was the LAST thing i wanted to deal with and feel haha. So luckily my friend was protecting me and then we left because i was getting trampled on. After that we saw Felguk and was in the front!!!! i honestly Dont remember it but just being in the crowd one with everybody and especially when they played the 'theme song' it was absolutely nuts just jumping and screaming at the same time as everybody else. No words could ever explain that feeling. Finally after a lot of shuffling and jumping we went to go see Kaskade&Deadmau5. i WISH i could remember them playing....but oh well. i just know i was going insane when they would play my fav. songs.
i just remember being really cold wearing guys clothing and being really really chill.
lets just say the ride back to long beach was very interesting, and oh so confusing.
Next day
didnt wake up til pretty late, and was trying to figure when to leave and meet up with my new friends who i just met. Finally got there again and met up with some ppl from AZ(it was their 1st rave EVER) and then met up with my new friends on the main floor. The atmosphere on Saturday was so different, there were wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy more ppl. Friday was really chill, even though there were a lot of ppl it wasnt chaotic. Around like 5 pm they stopped letting ppl onto the kinetic field and we were pretty much stuck, couldnt go out to pee, nothing..if we left we couldnt get back on the floor. so i was determined to stay there til EDC was over. So we moved our whole group to the front of the kinetic field. we got REALLY damn close. Finally saw dadalife and afrojack again, will.i.am. During will.i.am people started to jump the fence just to get on the field and the djs stopped playing their music and werent goign to play anymore if they kept on jumping the fences..it was absolutely craziness watching guys and girls get hit by cops. lol anywhoo
so i think during laidback luke it started to kick in and i HAD to leave. i was drinking way too much water and HAD to pee. i couldnt wait 7 hours to pee lol. so i had to leave the amazing spot i had in the crowd.
So one of my new friends left with me and we met this girl who crying and having a panic attack outside the girls bathroom and we felt bad so we decided to have her come with us. While watching laidback luke, benny benassi, above & beyond..i felt so connected with everyone! i wanted to have a conversation with everyone and become best friends with them! i met some awesome ppl where i was sitting.. like Janet <3!! ily! and some guy with stickers lmfao. but finally we got this girl to calm down and have a good time. Seriously i felt like i made bff's with EVERY single person at least 10 ft from where i was sitting/dancing in the stadium..suprisingly i remeber it. I was so hyper and ecstatic this night i couldnt stop shuffling and dancing and making BEST FRIENDS with everybody. trading all of my kandi and exchaning numbers, adding eachother on facebook, taking a billion pictures. At least half way into the set of above & beyond i was about to feel even better and some black bitch starts yelling at me i thought it was an undercover, telling me stop what im doing..i was about to flip a tit. and She was trying to sell some herbal pills, she was giving out 'samples' a lil bump. my dumbass was like OKAY! YES!! i couldnt help but say yes :/ the drip just tasted like ephedrine. so this girl i met decideds to buy some pills from her and i couldnt help but take one (dumb i know) it could of been ANYTHING. yes i know luckily it wasnt some crazy person and didnt kill me. but anywho it seriously felt like i was on crack/speed because i couldnt sit still i was dancing HARDCORE to TRANCE. lmfao. trying to get everyone around me all pumped and dance and feel like how i was.,lol. So this girl i met she was having more insane anxiety and was just too much for me and everybody else to handle, but we felt bad.her friends ditched her. so i decided to hook her up with the dude i came to edc with. it worked :P bam get to enjoy armin van buuren. but while im in the BIGGEST TRANCE OF MY LIFE listening on a meteropolitan day..this girl is annoying me yelling at me trying to get my attention when i hooked her up with a hottie. and im trying to push her away cuz she was runing my good timeee X_X . then i finally wanna actually dance to electro so we left to go see boys noize. i was shuffling that whole time they were playing and couldnt STOP. i couldnt sit still couldnt focus on talking but wanted to shuffle with everyone. i just remembe them playing some sick michael jackson remix. This girl is starting to get crazy jittery and wont stop annoying us but there's no way to leave her. so she was trying to tell me adn my friend that since her friends ditched her we have to wait with her for a cab which will take an hour or 2 because of the traffic. So my friend was like oh well take you home, which was in santa monica and we were staying in long beach. opposite directions. i was so sleepy and coming down and ready to pass out because i was dancing for like 12 hours.
So were leaving it took an hour it felt like to get out of there and then we have to find my friends car and we cant remember which parking lot he parked in.. only the weird material on the ground instead of parking on the cement. This girl is like oh i know this place so we assume she knows where she is directing us. This bitch got us lost for over an hour maybe even 2. then we had to take her home and she couldnt remember how to get to her car thats almost by her house. So im finally coming down and im sleepy and i just wanna shower/eat/sleep. im so exhausted, theyre still smoking and this bitch is so jittery shes shaking the whole car and i was laying and the back seat so my body was jumping up and down. lawl finally after another hour i told that bitch to gtfo. the drive back to the hotel was interesting and almost crashed a few times haha.
so that was EDC from what i remember.
lol. <3
i dont think weve ever been so excited to go and see our favorite artists and especially when there were gonna be so many PPL and just craziness. We left thursday and got in long beach pretty late, we couldnt sleep at all because we were so excited (seriously i dont think we slept) :P
The next day we left pretty early to meet up with some ppl ..so we didnt have to wait in line long and get in there quick
FINALLY got in and im trying to call ppl from AZ and meet up with them but they were all too fuckered up at the hotel and werent coming til later on. So me and my friend decided to walk around and explore. Ofcourse going down on the main floor, then we went to go see Afrojack, while shuffling my friend runs off and goes dance with a ton of sluts ( haha sorry dude but its true :P ) so i met these awesome ppl who i ran off with...and the rest of the night is a blur, um i just remember being on the kinetic field shuffling my ass off, and giving tons of ppl massages lawl.
Then went to go see Steve Aoki, that stage was SO packed. He should of played on a bigger stage anywho. while waiting for him to play with ppl i just met but felt so close too, lol seriously felt like ive known ALL like 15 or so ppl my whole life. i was right in the center kinda to the front of the crowd because it was just way too packed, andd then it finally started to kick it, things get real blurry and i dont wanna be smushed in this crowd, especially because im surrounded by all guys so im not getting any fresh air. When Steve Aoki played Warp, during the screaming part everyone went crazy and i was getting stuck in the middle of the hugh mosh pit, everything was starting to kick in and a mosh pit was the LAST thing i wanted to deal with and feel haha. So luckily my friend was protecting me and then we left because i was getting trampled on. After that we saw Felguk and was in the front!!!! i honestly Dont remember it but just being in the crowd one with everybody and especially when they played the 'theme song' it was absolutely nuts just jumping and screaming at the same time as everybody else. No words could ever explain that feeling. Finally after a lot of shuffling and jumping we went to go see Kaskade&Deadmau5. i WISH i could remember them playing....but oh well. i just know i was going insane when they would play my fav. songs.
i just remember being really cold wearing guys clothing and being really really chill.
lets just say the ride back to long beach was very interesting, and oh so confusing.
Next day
didnt wake up til pretty late, and was trying to figure when to leave and meet up with my new friends who i just met. Finally got there again and met up with some ppl from AZ(it was their 1st rave EVER) and then met up with my new friends on the main floor. The atmosphere on Saturday was so different, there were wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy more ppl. Friday was really chill, even though there were a lot of ppl it wasnt chaotic. Around like 5 pm they stopped letting ppl onto the kinetic field and we were pretty much stuck, couldnt go out to pee, nothing..if we left we couldnt get back on the floor. so i was determined to stay there til EDC was over. So we moved our whole group to the front of the kinetic field. we got REALLY damn close. Finally saw dadalife and afrojack again, will.i.am. During will.i.am people started to jump the fence just to get on the field and the djs stopped playing their music and werent goign to play anymore if they kept on jumping the fences..it was absolutely craziness watching guys and girls get hit by cops. lol anywhoo
so i think during laidback luke it started to kick in and i HAD to leave. i was drinking way too much water and HAD to pee. i couldnt wait 7 hours to pee lol. so i had to leave the amazing spot i had in the crowd.
So one of my new friends left with me and we met this girl who crying and having a panic attack outside the girls bathroom and we felt bad so we decided to have her come with us. While watching laidback luke, benny benassi, above & beyond..i felt so connected with everyone! i wanted to have a conversation with everyone and become best friends with them! i met some awesome ppl where i was sitting.. like Janet <3!! ily! and some guy with stickers lmfao. but finally we got this girl to calm down and have a good time. Seriously i felt like i made bff's with EVERY single person at least 10 ft from where i was sitting/dancing in the stadium..suprisingly i remeber it. I was so hyper and ecstatic this night i couldnt stop shuffling and dancing and making BEST FRIENDS with everybody. trading all of my kandi and exchaning numbers, adding eachother on facebook, taking a billion pictures. At least half way into the set of above & beyond i was about to feel even better and some black bitch starts yelling at me i thought it was an undercover, telling me stop what im doing..i was about to flip a tit. and She was trying to sell some herbal pills, she was giving out 'samples' a lil bump. my dumbass was like OKAY! YES!! i couldnt help but say yes :/ the drip just tasted like ephedrine. so this girl i met decideds to buy some pills from her and i couldnt help but take one (dumb i know) it could of been ANYTHING. yes i know luckily it wasnt some crazy person and didnt kill me. but anywho it seriously felt like i was on crack/speed because i couldnt sit still i was dancing HARDCORE to TRANCE. lmfao. trying to get everyone around me all pumped and dance and feel like how i was.,lol. So this girl i met she was having more insane anxiety and was just too much for me and everybody else to handle, but we felt bad.her friends ditched her. so i decided to hook her up with the dude i came to edc with. it worked :P bam get to enjoy armin van buuren. but while im in the BIGGEST TRANCE OF MY LIFE listening on a meteropolitan day..this girl is annoying me yelling at me trying to get my attention when i hooked her up with a hottie. and im trying to push her away cuz she was runing my good timeee X_X . then i finally wanna actually dance to electro so we left to go see boys noize. i was shuffling that whole time they were playing and couldnt STOP. i couldnt sit still couldnt focus on talking but wanted to shuffle with everyone. i just remembe them playing some sick michael jackson remix. This girl is starting to get crazy jittery and wont stop annoying us but there's no way to leave her. so she was trying to tell me adn my friend that since her friends ditched her we have to wait with her for a cab which will take an hour or 2 because of the traffic. So my friend was like oh well take you home, which was in santa monica and we were staying in long beach. opposite directions. i was so sleepy and coming down and ready to pass out because i was dancing for like 12 hours.
So were leaving it took an hour it felt like to get out of there and then we have to find my friends car and we cant remember which parking lot he parked in.. only the weird material on the ground instead of parking on the cement. This girl is like oh i know this place so we assume she knows where she is directing us. This bitch got us lost for over an hour maybe even 2. then we had to take her home and she couldnt remember how to get to her car thats almost by her house. So im finally coming down and im sleepy and i just wanna shower/eat/sleep. im so exhausted, theyre still smoking and this bitch is so jittery shes shaking the whole car and i was laying and the back seat so my body was jumping up and down. lawl finally after another hour i told that bitch to gtfo. the drive back to the hotel was interesting and almost crashed a few times haha.
so that was EDC from what i remember.
lol. <3
Monday, November 1, 2010
Before I Die..
When i was about 8 years old i saw a comet in mid daylight, and ever since i fell madly in love with Astronomy... <3! (it was love @ first sight) hahaha. Ever since that day i then became obsessed with meteor showers. and staying up til sunrise in the freezing cold til i see every last meteor go through our atmosphere. The feeling i get from seeing a beautiful meteor gives me such a high, no DRUG could ever give me. serioussssly. So before i die, i have a lot to see (astronomical wise)
Seeing Hayley's Comet
Launch a weather balloon
See the Northern Lights
See a total Solar Eclipse
Watch a Meteor Shower at the South Pole
Find a meteorite & make it into a piece of jewelry
Visit the Meteor Crater in Northern AZ
AND
See a Green flash
xox.
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